Today was Pee in a Cup Day!
Last time I had to pee in a cup was a couple of years ago. I had to persuade a friend to drive me half way across the state, since I didn't then have a car, or the ability to drive, to roughly where I live now, just so I could pee in a cup. After having done so, I wandered around the area a bit, then got the train to New York and from there back home.
This time was a little easier, because I have a car, but ironically, I had to go and pee in a cup that was roughly where I used to live two years ago. So I had to drive half way across the state. I was planning to go there and back in the morning, but when I called they had no idea I was due, so I had to wait a few hours until someone in California woke up and could sort the mess out. So I set off at quarter to two, got there around half past, filled in some forms then had to sit around for almost half an hour (why?), peed in a cup, then got home, wasting a sum total of about 2 and a half hours all told, just so I could pee in a cup. Isn't corporate America grand?
The reason for the cup peeing this time is the same as last time: many employers require a pre-employment drug screen before officially hiring you. By rights I ought to object to this gross violation of my privacy, but all told the two to three hours of dicking about to give a sample is as nought to the hassle that refusing to micturate on demand would cause. It's all a bit irrelevant anyway, because the test -- which is meant to be scheduled within a tight 48 hour time period so as to avoid you flushing your system, or some such -- is announced as part of the job offer, which you can think about for a few weeks, in which time you can go cold turkey and get the coke and crack out your system. There is then an idiotic 48 hour slot to give the sample, which causes more disruption, then afterwards you can immediately run out to your car and jack up with some pure narcotic of your choice. Perhaps they also fail you if you cold turkey hands are shaking so much that you spill most of the sample.
Anyway, provided I come up clean, this should be enough.
What's that you say?
Oh, yeah, I'm changing jobs. More on this some other time, I expect.