Nothing very interesting to say today, so it's time for another barrel-bottom-scraping, Pick of the Search Queries!

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard... but my milkshake explanation is no longer bringing all the search queries to this page. Milkshake queries have been trailing of dramatically in the last couple of weeks, so that the mega Milkshake totaliser is standing resolutely at 949. So, not much prospect of reaching 1000 any time soon, which is a bit sad. Hey everybody, just for a laugh type "milkshake explanation metaphor" into your favourite search engine and try to get here with that as your referrer... or alternatively, don't bother.

Still, the weird, perverted and kinky continue to get their kicks from this web page. For a second time, someone got here by looking for "Miss Piggy Wardrobe Jackson", which still creates more questions than it answers. Likewise, the persistent (but misspelt) who searched for 'Dervla Kerwin' on Monday morning, Monday afternoon, and Tuesday morning, before seemingly getting frustrated and started searching for Dervla Kerwin Naked on Tuesday afternoon. Try "A Time to Dance", that would be your best bet, although I don't know if that's out on DVD yet.

The person looking for "base jumping blogs". I dunno. Are you for people who blog while they are base jumping? Seems like a bit of a tall order to me. And the person who looked for "+fiona +nude +shrek +sex": you are one sick puppy. Despite the fact that this page is ranked third for this query. I don't know whether I want to be higher or lower for this. Also, this query came from Google Switzerland, so it had better not be anything to do with Dr Danny. Get back to your silicon wafers (still cannot say this without thinking of Mr Creosote, but there you go).

Lastly, "scissor truss pics". I don't know, and I don't want to know.