Well, it seems like some people are having a little trouble with the comments system, since no one seems to have managed to lodge any obscene insults in my http-referrer log, but still... I suppose I shall switch to the back up system, which is that to leave a comment you have to find a google search that reaches this page, and then click on the search result. The query string should then get stored in the search query page.

Talking of which, and in an attempt to make this blog entirely self-referential, some more search queries that have gotten (gotten?) people to this site.

Smurfhillbilly joe: much to my chagrin, whoever entered this query probably found some useful and pertinent information on this page, or at least more useful than anything on any of the other three pages that come up. Damn them.

Bloggs chocolate: Right. Which idiot wants to find someone writing a blog about chocolate? And why does everyone seem to think it's spelt blogg. It's a blog, you cretins. That's why this is a joke, Fred Bloggs Weblogs. Or maybe it should be Joe Bloggs. Or is it Joe Soap? No, hang on, Soap is some kind of web authoring tool thingy. Presumably it is easy to integrate into browsers -- such as Opera. Which would make it...

Alan Cumming's Family Album: Whoever searched for this is a bizarre voyeuristic freak, who needs to learn how to search with quotes. Of course, when you do, what you'll get is just this page, but that's no one's fault but your own.

And lastly...

When is a fish not a fish:
This is great! This is exactly the kind of search query people should be using. Utter gibberish. In fact, I wonder whether it's the first comment as suggested above (very easy: just fake your referrer to look like a google search page) since I can't find this blog with that search term.

OK then, "When is a fish not a fish"? Um, well, let's proceed by analogy. A door is not a door when it's ajar. So, perhaps a fish is not a fish when it's afloat? That's kind of weak, but I can't think of any other good adjectives that begin in a. Still, it reminds me of one of my favourite songs of all time, ever: "Help! I'm a fish!" (not to be confused with "Help! I'm a rock!", which is an altogether different song). "Help! I'm a fish!" is a metaphor for a situation that a lot of people find themselves in, of having finished with school or university, and being suddenly alone in a new town or city, and the feelings of loneliness and isolation which accompany that. The lyrics are quite doleful, yet somehow it's the most affirming song that I know: in someway, in acknowledging the situation, you take control of your helplessness, and it is no longer something to fear. Just take a listen to those lyrics:

"I'm a little yellow fish / in the deep blue sea / won't somebody save me?"

Tragic. And yet joyous. Little Trees (the artists) -- where are you now?

Oh now look what you've made me do -- I've gone and burnt my rice. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to burn rice?

Finally, good news for liberals in america -- sodomy is OK, and Strom Thurmond is dead. Hurrah! I am currently having lawyers looking into the legality of sodmozing the corpse of Strom Thurmond (surely an anagram?), and I'll get back to you on this. Ta-ra!