20050523

The White Mountains...


In a ceremonial ritual, the post-pubescent human surrenders himself to the iPod and is returned several hours later, his or her head shaven clean and "capped" with a metallic implant rendering them docile to the iPods' will. Due to the hormonal changes of puberty, humans cannot be capped at an earlier age.

How to recognise someone who has been "capped" by an iPod: the white implants in the ear, with wires leading down to the control device. Such humans are usually docile and detatched from reality, but do not attempt to remove their implants, as they will become angry and violent, commanded to attack by their iPod controller.

Beware the iPods!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Study confirmation:

When controlled by the iPod, the subject became surly and uncooperative, but was able to perform IT consultancy duties at over three times the speed of a normal mortal.

There are fewer better ways to cope with ArcView GIS crashing again than assaulting ones brain with incoherent punk music.