Evening all.

I should point out that after the exertions of yesterday, in which I not only went to Philadelphia and back in the falling snow, but also took a quick stop off in Princeton in sub-zero temperatures. I therefore think that I am quite justified in not having left the house today. Well, there is four inches of snow blocking my egress. So, I am quite happy to stay in and slump in front of SNL.

Anyway, in response to the recent posting by angel, whose new site design makes her look like a goth, and also makes me feel sad that I fall below the line: classified as a blogger that she doesn't know; not a member of the exclusive group of bloggers that she does know. Well, OK, so technically I am a fictional character who exists only to expound the half-arsed imaginings of a semi-anonymous author who refuses to admit that this is a blog, but my point remains... increasingly obscure.

Sorry, I appear to have left a sentence in mid-lurch. Where was I? Oh yes, the fragrant Angel muttered something about having Jehovah's Witnesses (I recommend pouring boiling water over them). What I found interesting was that the Witness began the conversation with the question "Do you think people concentrate too much on material things, especially at this time of year?" That's interesting, because it reminds me of the kind of thing that telemarketers usually say when they call me up in the morning and wake me up when I am quite reasonably sleeping in because I'm lazy. They often start with something that I call, for want of something more concise, "A question to which most reasonable people would be obliged to answer yes". I remember being woken by someone representing Mothers Against Drunk Driving (I'm still looking for a group that represents the interests of drunk drivers, who I have found seem to have no one looking out for them), who called up to ask me if I thought that it was increasinagly important to think of other people, "in these difficult times". My preference in these situations is to call them on this: when someone asks a question like this, just give them the answer that they weren't expecting. Hence: Q: Do you think people concentrate too much on material things, especially at this time of year? A: No.

The other option that I have heard advocated in these situations is to convert instantly, since they also aren't expecting that. When they ask if you have welcomed Jesus into your life respond that you hadn't before, but now that they mention it, yes, super, I believe! Anyway, this is someone else's idea, and quite likely someone whose blog I read, so I will let you fill in the remainder of the details yourself.

Meanwhile: in the interestes of being too lazy to send email to people, I'll just blog this instead. I will be flying to Engerland a couple of days before Christ's 2004th, and will remain there until Uncle Sam sees fit to renew my J-1, which is always a bit of a gamble. So I'm looking for things to do to celebrate the fact that I will be dating cheques wrongly for the subsequent few months. Usually my new year's eve celebrations go pretty badly. Last years celebreation at Chez Triv was a pleasant exception to this rule. (For those not familar with triv.org.uk, think of a slightly less sinister greenend but without the universally popular SSH client). So, I thought I would offer a never to be repeated deal: I can grace your UK-based New Year's Eve party.

Here's what I bring to the table: I will bring myself and my charming alter-egos to the venue of your soiree; I will also bring some quantity of alcohol and my own sleeping arrangements. Now, I know that I will be ingreat demand, so if you want my attendance, then please fill in and return this simple questionairre:

1. Where is the location of your party?
a) In London's fashionable England
b) In the people's republic of Cambridge
c) In Coventrycestershire

2. Which adjective best describes your intended party?
a) Tame
b) Tepid
c) Lukewarm
d) Insipid

3. How is your party most likely to finish?
a) At five past midnight, with everyone sighing "Oh, *finally*"
b) Gently petering out at 2am
c) As the sun rises, the party gently dies
d) The party will never end.

...anyway, more of this later, it's time for Weekend Update.

Mmm, Tina Fey. And she is. Fey, that is. Goodnight.