Oh, come on -- which of us hasn't indulged in explicit banter with naive junior minions some thirty something years younger than us? I know have. Why, only this evening I was having this perfectly innocent IM conversation:
[19:29] M: hello
[19:30] hughanchor6969: hey
[19:30] M: How's you?
[19:30] hughanchor6969: ok
[19:32] M: I should probably obey you re: Veronica Mars at some point.
[19:32] hughanchor6969: kep scrounging
[19:32] M: I'm such a late adopter of TV shows.
[19:32] hughanchor6969: bo dude
[19:32] M: er
[19:32] M: you okay?
[19:32] hughanchor6969: i am in pensecola…had to catch a plane
[19:33] M: hmm
[19:33] hughanchor6969: indeed
[19:36] M: A plane where?
[19:36] hughanchor6969: now in my hotel room
[19:36] M: which is where?
[19:37] hughanchor6969: for the campaign
[19:37] M: What campaign?
[19:37] hughanchor6969: not yet
[19:38] M: are you a real person?
OK, so M. got suspicious before I managed to get around to asking him what he was wearing, and if he wouldn't minding slipping it off, but you get my point.
Which gave me an idea. We all know Eliza, the automated psychological chat bot. I decided to feed the honourable gentleman's comments into Eliza to see what came out. Here's the result:
I am the psychotherapist. Please, describe your problems. Each time
you are finished talking, type RET twice.
Maf54: now in my hotel room
ELIZA: What makes you believe now in your hotel room?
Maf54: for the campaign
ELIZA: Is it because of the people you hang around with that you say for the campaign?
Maf54: not yet
ELIZA: Is it because of problems at school that you are going through all
Maf54: how my favorite young stud doing?
ELIZA: Is it because your favorite young stud doing that you came to me?
Maf54: from what?
ELIZA: Are you sure that from what?
Maf54: tahts good
ELIZA: Earlier you said your favorite young stud doing?
Maf54: you need a massage
ELIZA: Do you really think I might want to have this massage?
Maf54: must have
ELIZA: How do you reconcile any hobbies you have?
Maf54: love to watch that
ELIZA: What makes you think you love to watch that
Maf54: those great legs running
ELIZA: Is it because of your sex life that you say those great legs running?
Maf54: well dont ruin my mental picture
ELIZA: Don't tell me what to do. I am the psychiatrist here! Perhaps this has something to do with hangups you have?
ELIZA: I need a little more detail please.
Maf54: youll be way hot then
ELIZA: You mentioned that your favorite young stud doing?
Maf54: better be
ELIZA: Possibly your inhibitions are related to this.
Maf54: well i better let you go do oyur thing
ELIZA: Why do you say you better let I go do oyur thing?
Maf54: did any girl give you a haand job this weekend
ELIZA: What makes you believe I would like to have this massage?
Maf54: are you
ELIZA: Is it because of some problems in your childhood that you are going
through all this?
Maf54: good so your getting horny
ELIZA: Do you get horny often?
Maf54: i am sure
ELIZA: Are you sure that you are sure?
Maf54: why not
ELIZA: Can you be more explicit?
Maf54: at your age it seems that it would be daily
ELIZA: Does it bother you that it would be daily?
Maf54: thats a good number
ELIZA: You mentioned that I would like to have this massage?
Maf54: in the shower
ELIZA: Maybe this is related to your life?
Maf54: in the bed
ELIZA: Is it because of the people you hang around with that you say in the
Maf54: on your back
ELIZA: Do you really think you were horny?
Maf54: love details
ELIZA: Perhaps problems at school could have caused this
Actually not a bad diagnosis. Although, despite ELIZA's wishes, it's tough to see how he could be any more explicit...